Should I stay or should I go?

I totally forgot in my last 2 blog entries to tell you about my camera. The camera I've got with me has been with me on every adventure I've been on since I got it for Christmas 2005. I even bought an underwater cover for it when I was scuba diving! But sadly when I met Kasha in Ruitelan my camera said "enough"! It wouldn't work anymore. I got it to take a couple of pictures the day after but as soon as we entered the province of Galicia I got one picture of the sign and that was all she wrote. My camera is no more. I love that camera so much that I should have a funeral for it. But instead I'm gonna see if I can't get it fixed when I come back to Iceland. Also I forgot to mention that since I thought my stomach problems might be a result of the ibufen/ibuprofen, I haven't taken any since breakfast at Ave Fenix in Villafranca.

But onto this blog. I awoke in Triacastela to a beautiful note from Tori. She had gone on ahead and later that day I got a message from Antonello telling me that she had walked 47 km's that day and caught up with him. You go girl!!! It was around 8:00 when I awoke and Kasha was there, very tired, having slept pretty bad that night. She left as I went to take a shower, still filthy from the day before. It was so good to wash off the sins of yesterday and as I bathed a question entered my mind: "Should I stay or should I go?" Should I relax here in Triacastela and take a rest day, which would be my first, or should I march on as far as my body would take me. I felt I still had a fever and was still a little sick. I wasn't sure what I should do, still a little groggy in the morning and hard for me to gauge my wellbeing.

As I was about to sit down for prayer and meditation, to decide what to do in the matter, my mother sent me an sms. I replied and told her that I was sick. She replied saying with something I interpreted as her playing doctor. I became obstinate immediatly, my default reaction to my mothers attempts at playing doctor. It's a bad habit I developed over the years, it's not her fault in the least, and I need to be in fit spiritual condition to respond to this in any other way than obstinance. I didn't want this to cloud my mind when I had to make this important decision. It seems that so many people can affect me in so many ways when it comes to making decisions. My mother also has opinions on matters that affect me greatly and I find it hard to contradict them. Some people affect my decisions because I don't want their disapproval so I'm more likely to agree with them unless I'm in fit spiritual condition as well. When I love someone they have a great hold on my decisions and when I don't like someone their likes might as well be my dislikes...again, if I'm not in fit spiritual condition. I was sick at that moment and I could feel the obstinance clouding my mind and I needed to get rid of it so I could make my decision. I prayed and during meditation I believe I made a sound choice in the matter. I could feel that I was in better condition than the day before and that I could walk a short distance today, perhaps even less than the bare minimum, and rest for the afternoon there. If it was too hard I would rest at the next Albergue. As I was about to leave the owner of the Albergue arrived and it was 9:30. She had a totally different reaction to me not having left her Albergue than the owner at La Faba. She wished me a Buen Camino (good Camino), a phrase we say and hear about a hundred times a day, but somehow it never becomes tiresome to me.

I had thought that we were out of the mountains but soon after I started walking a steep steep hill awaited me. The day was not without it's steep hills but I rested about an hour into the trip, taking off my socks and letting my blister sore air dry according to Kasha's instructions. When I stood up to walk again I met my favorite Brazilian and walked with him and his friends for a while. I told him that my camera had quit on me the day before, just as I entered the amazingly beautiful province of Galicia. He said that wouldn't do and took my email address and promises to send me pictures of the area when he arrives home. That day we had fog, clouds, sunshine and temperatures that varied greatly. I can't wait to see the photo's.

I hadn't really had a proper meal since I was in Villafranca (which might have been the meal to cause my current problems) and at lunch I looked all over the menu to see what I could have. My stool was still liquid so I wanted something proper that would hopefully solidify my poop. All I could think to eat on the menu was a hamburger and that was my first meal in a while; a gorgeous hamburger with veggies. I ate it slowly and relaxed. It was a good meal.

I came to Sarria at around 14:30 but I wanted to go further. So after a nice restroom stop, very appreciated restroom stop, I marched on. I ended up in Barbadelo. Now the walk from Triacastela to Barbadelo is at least 23,8 km's but it could also have been as much as 29,6 km's, opinions differ greatly on the matter. The most common answer was 25 km's though. I was there at a little past 16:00 at one of the most beautiful Albergue's I've seen on the trip. It had a view to the mountains in the distance, it had a great garden and beautiful houses. I was so happy to be there.

After stretching, a shower and cleaning my clothes I just relaxed. I clipped my toenails, I put cream on my feet and I calmly talked to the people that were there. I waited almost 25 minutes for the computer that was there, the Albergue only had one. I didn't mind, I just sat with my feet up and wrote in my wonderful small book that Helena bought for me in the Notre Dame in Paris. When it was my turn for the computer I started writing my blog. I was sick and as usual I was writing in a crowded area with people chatting around me and talking to me so it took me quite some time to write the blogs. People came and went, my interpretation of their reactions being that they were rather fussed about how long I was taking. I decided not to write more than 2 blogs, even though I "owed" 3. I couldn't have written more anyway, my head was foggy and I could feel the fever begging me to be still and relax. And so I did exactly that. I ate alone and wrote in my journal in between meals. I sat outside and had my tea there and watched the sunset (what little you could see) and enjoyed the beautiful mountain view. I made a few comments to a few people but mostly I just wrote in my little journal and enjoyed the silence. It was a great experience. I topped the night off by lying next to a pillar with my back on the floor and my feet up the pillar. It was so good to relieve pressure from my legs and to avoid a build up of fluids again.

I went to bed satisfied that I had made the right decision that day. I hope you don't let your reactions to other people's behavior affect important decisions that you have to make beautiful people!